Maturity - God's Gift Or An Acquired Skill?

by Mr. Ishwar Parmar | Chapter 8, Act 1

You must have heard the popular saying that maturity is the way of life. That a person who is mature is not only able to handle most situations in life competently but is also able to take level headed decisions when the situation demands it. Much like life’s other traits, such as wisdom, intelligence, loving, caring and sensitiveness, maturity is a relative term. It varies from person to person and from situation to situation. However, is there a way to define who a mature person is? If so, was this person mature to start with or was this a skill that was acquired by the person through conscious effort and life experiences? Let’s find out.

First, let’s look at the commonly accepted traits of a mature person. A mature person:

  1. Believes in taking responsible action rather than just reacting to a situation
  2. Analyzes the situation around him or her, the relationships, people around him or her, and even the place. A mature person strives to first understand the setup that he or she is in before reacting
  3. Has an end goal in mind and does not take actions without understanding the specific aims that are to be achieved
  4. Has harmony in his or her thoughts, words, and actions. In other words, a mature person is the one who practices what he or she preaches
  5. Has a mastery over his or her emotions. Therefore, mature people are dependable, have a calm demeanour and are not easily provoked, are focused on their goals, and are usually detail oriented
  6. Is usually clear in his or her mind regarding whether they should take an action or not after analyzing the various variables associated with a situation
  7. Knows full well the consequences of his or actions and is prepared to face them
  8. Takes into account the feelings of people around him, thereby doing the right thing in the right way
  9. Believes in self improvement by continuously learning from those around him or her as well as from past mistakes
  10. Understands that life is short and so does not carry any baggage. The mature person tries to live life to the fullest, thereby making his existence meaningful to both himself/herself and to the society as a whole.

Now that you know the common traits of mature people, how can you start your journey to being mature? Perhaps, the following steps can help you get started:

  1. Self introspection is a key requisite to being a mature person. The deeper you can introspect, the wiser you can expect to become
  2. Understand which life values are important for you. Once you decide this, ensure that your thoughts, words, and actions are not only in harmony with each other but also with your life values. Once you reach this harmony, there will be a balance in the three spheres of your life
  3. Though harmony of thoughts, words and actions is important, it cannot exist without also individually developing each of these aspects. So, at a physical level, you need to take care of your body. At an intellectual level, you need to keep a healthy mind. And at a spiritual level, you need to keep clear and pure intentions. This way, your body, mind, and soul each get adequate attention for development
  4. Start believing that you are the one in control of your own life. You are the one who can decide whether your life turns out well or not. So steer your life towards the path that offers you happiness, comfort, and cheer. Don’t be stuck in life’s circumstances as they will keep on changing. Face life on your own terms and develop an attitude of never say die
  5. To develop maturity, keep a positive outlook in life. This will not only help you get by the troubles in life with a smile, but will also help you become more accessible to others around you. A positive outlook also helps you become earnest, thereby fulfilling all the roles you have in your life, without much effort
  6. Accept that certain people, relationships, and situations in life will just not work out the way you want them to. So, learn from those situations, move on from there and try to not carry any baggage from the past
  7. Understand that you are your own person. You have both strengths and weaknesses. Be aware of these, but don’t be tied down by them. Also, how you perceive yourself is more important than how the world perceives you. So, ensure that you first value yourself before expecting others to value you
  8. Keep a level head irrespective of whether things are good or bad in your life. In other words, be the master of your emotions. If you learn not to get too excited when things go your way or not too depressed when things don’t work out, you would have taken a firm step towards maturity

To further drive the point home, let’s try to understand the life of an experienced driver. He drives through different terrains during his life time. He drives through flat surfaces, hilly areas, the country side, highways, and even in the city crowds. He gets to face the unexpected on a daily basis, yet he chooses to drive on for the benefit of not only his passengers but also for his own benefit. Similarly, a person can choose how to steer life’s wheel and give it direction. A mature person at the steering, intelligently steers his life to a direction of positivity, precision, efficiency, and sensibility. On the other hand, an immature person steers his or her life to a dissatisfied and frustrated end. This life is full of broken relationships, complaining, sulking, and even cribbing.

Life is short. However, it gives us multiple chances to improve our situation by improving ourselves. Irrespective of what age, profession or life situation we are in, we can choose to change our daily grind. To do so, we need a mature head on our shoulders. This maturity will give us the right mindset, the right attitude, and with time the right skills to face the ups and down in life with equal strength. This maturity will give us the strength to make our lives a dream life and attain the goals we have set for ourselves.